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雅思写作

名师解析20160915雅思考试作文范文

2016-09-21

来源:环球教育教研中心

小编:Eileen 83
摘要:

  值此中秋之际,考生们居然迎来了一场考试。而且写作题目如审题稍有不慎,后果不堪设想。通常而言, 大作文写作在审题阶段,共有六个关键要素需要考生们着重分析。但是在真正的考试中,个别要素并非经常出现。如这次题目中的“限定性修饰”要素,其实也是有相当一段时间未于各位谋面了。

  题目如下:

  As countries develop, more and more people buy and use private cars. Do the advantages of this trend for individuals outweigh disadvantages for the environment? 20160915

  读题之后, 恐怕很多考生都简单地将此题默认为一般的优缺点对比题了,其实稍仔细些不难发现, 本题的advantages 和 disadvantages 后面有明显的限制性的定语. 这无疑就在很大程度上限制了大家论点的范围。例如,通常我们认为私家车的普及会给我们带来更多的就业机会和经济繁荣。这一论点,明显不符合本题要求。此外,私家车普及的缺点其一是导致了道路交通安全隐患。同样,这个论点也不能在本文中出现。本题目通过两个限制性的定语,很大程度上限定了考生们可以选择的论点。此类的大作文题目尽管不算太多,但是也需要考生们极其注意。稍后在本文后面,笔者会列举近年有类似限制性定语的题目供大家参考。

  With surprising popularity of private cars, great convenience brought by use of private vehicles and overly high environmental cost are both what people are confronted with satisfyingly and reluctantly. Thus, some people begin to rethink whether humans sacrifice too much environmental cost in order to enjoy the convenience derived from usage of their own cars.

  只要审题阶段没有偏离主题,其实本题论证起来并不算难。开头段通过背景介绍和点题的方式引出全文,可谓中规中矩。此段并没有准确表达出笔者的观点,这个在真正的写作中是被允许的。

  Private cars make people’s lives fairly different from lives we used to live. During hours when public transports cannot offer service, driving private cars will surely be the first and the most possible choice. In order to get to some places hardly reached by public transports, people have no other way except using their own cars. Having road trips with family members has already become a popular recreational activity across all nations. People especially young generation cannot imagine how their lives would be without private cars.

  主段一,笔者重点论述了私家车给人们生活带来的便利。换言之,本段就是聚焦于这个事实的优点。

  The environmental cost people are paying for usage of cars should never be ignored. Noise from transport and bad air quality caused by tail gas are what people living in cities have to suffer from in their daily life. Actually, both kinds of pollution can be attributed to the consumption of fossil fuel that is fuelling majority vehicles on this planet. As soon as authorities pull the trigger for utilizing clean fuel for private cars such as cars powered by electricity or bio-ethanol, the environmental cost is able to be diminished substantially.

  与主段一相呼应,本段着重于阐述私家车在环境方面造成的问题。并且通过提供方案的形式来说明,这些环境问题是可被解决的。言外之意,既是这些缺点并不可怕,也并不重要。

  As is widely accepted, in this present-day society, owning private cars imply a modern lifestyle, notwithstanding humans ought not to neglect what they have paid for using private cars. Instead, what humans should do is racking our brain to find out means to work out environmental destruction formed by usage of private vehicles. By analogy, advantages that individuals can appreciate, without a shadow of doubt, outweigh the environmental cost that humans might not have paid.

  由于前文一直没有明确表达笔者的观点,因此在结尾段尤其最后一句笔者重申了自己的倾向。因此,和通常出现的结尾段落相比,这个段落在篇幅上稍长。尽管如此,应尽量做到不与前文出现重复。

  同样有限制性修饰的大作文题目如下:

  School leavers go traveling and work before going to university. Are there more advantages or disadvantages on their study?20151107

  Nowadays, men and women in many countries decide to have babies at an older age. What are the reasons? And what effects does this trend have on society and family life? 20150521

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